There Are No Words..

First Timers

First time? Start here. Read "The Primer" and follow the link at the end. Chronological order makes more sense for the stories.

Who shived you in the neck?

Blogger Profile: The name's Northe.
Been blogging since: September 2004.
View my complete profile here.

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Entertainment in Flash Form

I know you guys must think that I exaggerate, stretch the truth or even flat out make stuff up. I promise you nothing that I say is beyond what happens. Ready for another example of brilliance?

Female Boss loves her greeting cards. She has a thick stack of Birthday, Christmas, Congratulatory etc.. you name it she's got it. Tons of em. The type of card she usually buys are ones with animals. She's a huge animal lover, I think you can deduce this by now by the number of pets in the investment property. The cards she happened to buy this time out are the CG (Computer Graphic) ones with dogs, that look real and I'm sure some are, posing in clothes and what not. Lots of random crap and corny lines. So yesterday, she comes back with this handful of cards.

There's one card that absolutely intrigues her. There is a classroom full of cats, dogs, ferrets, birds.. stuff like that. All of them are not paying attention to the teacher.. some have sunglasses on, some are sleeping, paper airplanes and spitballs are flying etc. Just a random scene from some '80s high school movie, except for one cat in the front that has nerd glasses on and a big smile on his face. Basically congratulating the recipient of doing well in school while everyone else goofed off. Great gag..

She hands me the card I give out a fake chuckle and hand it back.

"Really take a look at that one, it's amazing!"

I grab it, stare at it for another 5 seconds, give out a fake chuckle and hand it back.

"I mean come on, Northe, you aren't impressed with that?"

I don't say anything cuz now I realize she's about to baptize me in an aura of stupid.

"I mean, how do they do that?"

I was just about to let her know about computer programs that would make it easy for a skilled artist to create any scene they wanted to but before I could speak, "That photo has to be one in a million, all of the dogs and cats are posing perfect! And how the hell does that cat's smile look just like a human's? That's amazing... How are they all getting along and not going after each other!?"

What else can I say regarding the matter, my jaw unhinged and fell under my desk, I haven't found it yet. If anything look at these posts as self-esteem boosters. Feel better about yourself.